family.

OP's finally over and done with.
i'm so happy for val's group who did well for their OP.
they are going to be filmed!
that's so cool. (:

now's the only hurdle left.
INSIGHTS AND REFLECTIONS.
oh gosh. i havent even completed my first draft.
and the deadline is on tuesday!
must chiong out soon.

and yes.
Janice's belated birthday celebration today!
AT KBOX :D
she finally has a chance to go there.
then we er ren shi jie there.
hahahaha.

we got super high.
and took many videos LOL.
SO FUNNY.
and i realised that our voices blend very nicely tgt.
K 歌二人组! :D :D
but the best part is..
no one came to chase us out even after the slot has ended.
heehee (:
oh man. Kbox is love.

i need to apologise to janice for not bringing my wallet
and causing her to wait 20 minutes for me cos i was late from CO.
Sorry janice!
_________________________

On a sadder note.
this week had been one with constant unrest at home.
it started with a notice that my dad might be going to China for 2 years.
so my mom was furious.
and they quarrelled for a week already.

i understand that both parties have their reason.
and it's not going to be easy for anyone with this decision.
but don't parents know that children will hurt the most
when they start to fight?
i have cried in silence for the previous nights.
but i don't want to add on to their worries.

it seems like my dad could only confide in me.
his weary expression tells me that he needs this chance badly.
and i really want to help him as much as i could.
what could i do for him? nothing.
the rest of the family is blaming dad for being selfish.
i can see his sense of helplessness.

i told my sis and grandma that daddy has his reasons,
and that we should see things from different perspectives.
my mom took it as i support my dad's decision,
that i was broadcasting his reasons to garner for support.
now she's also angry with me.

it is not that i'm standing on any side.
i only feel that we should solve problems as a family.
who wouldn't be upset about the separation?

the quarrel and fight in the morning was scary.
i think i was in a state of confusion then.
i actually left house without my gz nails, umbrella and purse.
and even placed my kbox card on my shoe rack.

my subconciousness wants me to escape from this.
perhaps i'm just too afraid to face the reality.
and i don't know how long more i can tolerate all this.

what happened to my family?
and why am i always the one who couldn't do anything?
how about all of us give and take?
isn't that what a family is suppose to behave?

sometimes i really think i wasn't here.

7:57 PM ღ i thought of you.